You are finding yourself in an awkward and a rather worrying position yet again. After your daughter had been diagnosed with an eating disorder only a few months ago, you were relieved for her to have started therapy.
But only after 12 weeks of therapy, here she is been discharged and you feel you’ve been let down. It is clear that she still needs help.
You discuss it with your daughter and she is not sure she is feeling any better. At the same time she can’t see any point in being referred again. She even wonders if it actually helped her at all? She feels now, that she’s been labelled by her diagnoses, that’s who she is.
You now have a HUGE dilemma: WHAT DO YOU DO?
Thoughts are racing through your mind:
Maybe she’ll be fine, after all she had 12 weeks of help, surely she’s improved since then… and she doesn’t thinks there is any point in continuing.
But that isn’t right to discharge a teenager who’s not fully recovered and surely there must be something else that can be done…
Shouldn’t she be recovered by now? Otherwise, would she have been discharged? Maybe she is better…but then it is obvious that she is still not right.
And with mental health issues, it surely takes longer than just a few weeks to recover?
If you are or have been experiencing this, you are not alone. Many parents go through the pain of not knowing what to do, feeling stuck and not having anyone to ask when it comes to their child’s mental health.
Unfortunately, this is how NHS services work. Your child will be given a certain amount of therapy and then you are left to your own devises.
No one to tells you what your options are and that you need to keep getting help for your daughter until she recovers.
The only person that can change it for your daughter right now is YOU
- The first and the most crucial step is to go back to your GP and have your child referred again. You may want to go private or look for help somewhere else. But don’t just leave it.
Therapy of a few weeks with conditions such as eating disorders and self harm is no time. There is so much more going on for your child at school, at home, not even mentioning the changes to do with growing up, including hormonal changes.
The therapy needs to be ongoing until your daughter, yourself and the therapist see results and mutually agree about the next step.
- If you or your child was not happy with the previous therapist, ask for someone else, eg someone senior and with more experience.
Your child might have had a trainee ( yes, they need to learn and practice ) but make sure the next person is someone you and your child get on with.
- Be demanding if you want to help your child to recover.
These conditions can be overlooked and underestimated. Only you know what huge effect they have not only on your child but you and the whole family too which I often hear about in my one to one sessions.
If your GP doesn’t want to refer your child again, don’t stop, keep going and look for help somewhere else until you find it!
- No matter what your daughter says about therapy, she might not be keen on continuing with it. But YOU ARE IN CHARGE !It may not be easy at the present point and she might not appreciate what you are doing for her now but one day she will thank you.
The sooner you get help, the sooner your daughter will recover!
Over to you
How do you deal with daily challenges to do with your child or your child’s condition? Do you have any support when you need it most? How do you keep a positive outlook on life?
Let us know your thoughts.
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If you have any questions, need support or would like to find out about how I can help, contact me.