You are feeling helpless, frustrated, angry and totally drained.
Managing your loved one’s behavior has been a huge strain for you as you’ve been getting very little rest.
Your daughter has been going through a tough time. You are needed 24/7.
Her struggles with bulimia has taken over your life and you don’t know how much longer you can keep going.
You don’t even think of:
When was the last time you went out and actually enjoyed yourself?
When did you last see a friend?
When did you take a break?
How do you rest?
You want to be around all the time in case your loved one needs you so you stay in but you are sick of being stuck indoors.
The one thing no one tells you when you care for a young person with bulimia – is that if you let it, it takes over your life without you noticing it.
The constant worry, angst, running around and sleepless nights impact you and your health. This condition will push you to the limit until you are totally debilitated.
This is an extremely tough position to be in and no one teaches you how to deal with it but the sooner you do, the better.
Do You ever think of Self care?
Self-care is not self-indulgent, self-centred or selfish. It’s vital for prevention of a burnout and stress-related problems.
You are crucial in your loved one’s life right now and a you play a big part in their recovery. The better your well-being the better care you are able to provide to speed up their recovery.
When I spoke to a client recently in my one to one sessions, she revealed that she finally learned to prioritize her time. After having a short break from her daughter, she returned rested and recharged. She was in the right frame of mind to give the best support and take on the next challenge
Which one of these could you do tomorrow, next week?
1. Get some respite, even taking a bath or stepping out into the fresh air
2. Go out and do something you enjoy without feeling guilty
3. See people, talk and share
4 . Get pampered at least once in a while
Yes, self-care means temporarily removing yourself from the person you are caring for, but (paradoxically) this is a good thing and absolutely imperative. It will benefit you both.
If you want provide the best support, you need to care for yourself, before you care for your loved one.
By clearing your mind and recharging, you will find that your approach to your daughter will be more positive and you will be able to make decisions easier.
If you don’t, what kind of help would you be able to provide from the verge of exhaustion?
“Just imagine having more energy and responding and making decisions in a calm and patient way”
Looking after yourself and seeking support will keep you sane, physically well and strong enough to look after your loved one.
Over to you
What has your experience been?
How do you recharge?
What are your thoughts?
Pass it on
Please, share this post with anyone you think will find it useful.
When you are overwhelmed, there is always a way through. If you have any questions or would like find out about help and support I offer, you can book “Your next step to supporting your loved one with bulimia” complimentary session to find out more.
You can also sign up for a free E book: “What parents need to know”
Photo credit: theglobalpanorama / Foter / CC BY-SA